This past weekend I had the great privileged of being at a district leadership conference for my church. It was great because it was a conference for women leaders, and there was no watering down what our role in the church could be. Should be.

It took the position of of helpmate and esteemed it.

It looked at the "younger" leaders as invaluable. It gave us all a voice and a calling. A destiny.

Sitting in that place, surrounded by women working to serve Jesus in their churches we were able to meet with a number of missionaries we support. Home missionaries to broken cities and neighborhoods, and missionaries to lands I can't pronounce.

I have never felt called to leave my native country to preach to others. I have always been very fully convinced that God had called my family to stay and live lives that pointed to Christ in our everyday. Wanting desperately to give the gift that I embrace so fully to everyone I know.

And now with a family, a debt, and regular responsibilities that window feels closed... but sitting there I surprised myself by the deep desire I had to go and serve in that way. To pack what we could in a suitcase and head to a land I've never seen and preach.

I can't say God is calling me that way. I can't even say I'd know what to do ar have the stick to it-ness to make that kind of life... but for the first time it seemed like a beautiful, and not overwhelming, option.