It's almost as if I have been asleep for a while and something in me woke up. It's pretty amazing really.

And you know what started it all? Committing to 10 days of corporate prayer with my church, earlier this year.

I had not been terribly excited about it. It was a hard commitment, and I wasn't even able to make it each night. Babies are far less interested in mom making it to prayer.

Some nights, even while I was there, I felt kind of blah and disconnected. My mind would wander and I'd have to retrain my thoughts back on God. I wasn't really "getting a lot" out of most evenings. I was going, I was participating, and my heart was fully there...and still some nights just ended. I went home and when asked about the evening I'd say they were "good."

Through it all though, I was *very* aware that God was moving. In subtle, hard to see, yet still powerful and life changing, ways.

Tonight hammered that in for me a bit.

I realized tonight while sitting in service, listening to my pastor preach about all being a part of one body, the importance of each piece...I realized that an old familiar hurt, so often aggravated by these types of lessons, was missing.

It wasn't whispering "ya, but" s in my ear or pointing to the actions of others. If anything I was reminded of the grace and forgiveness that God and people have shown me, countless times. I saw the billions of acts of love and kindness that have been shown me and my family.

Instead of pain there was peace.

I can trace the healing to a specific moment in those prayer meetings. Not a big deliberate moment either, just a stirring that something was changing.

Tonight? I saw the change.

Once again, I am awed that such a great big God cares so much about the little things in my small life.